Is there an App for that?

In response to my blog about how much I need music, one of my good friends told me about an iPhone app that can record and identify music. For those who my have an iPhone or iTouch it is called Shazam! (which is a name I already like because of the superhero, Captain Marvel). While, I have not tested it out yet, it makes me wonder if the iPhone really does have an app for everything? Coincidentally, I spent most of my Saturday night downloading free apps to my iPhone and a lot of these really work well.

I have needs. We all do. I can look up apps on iTunes and see what is out there. I am mostly interested in free ones. But let me ask….Is there an app for….

  • Porn! I mean you could be home alone one night and your computer’s either too slow or maybe you don’t have one! Is there an app where Porn can be watched the way it should be? and can you fast forward?
  • Rolling a blunt! Anyone of us could have a bad day at work and you just need to relieve the stress…or perhaps have cataracts (…and own an iPhone?). In either case, rolling a fatty might be an issue. Not enough weed…the paper is not rolling right, whatever the issue. Is there an app for first time blunt rollers?
  • Strip Clubs Finder! In a new town? Visiting parents or friends? At a conference? You are just bored out of your fucking mind and you need some sort of adult entertainment and have no clue where the nearest (or hottest) strip club is. Is there an app to help you find one?

  • Blog Topics! Stuck on a topic? Don’t know what to write so you resort to Facebook lists and other silly questionnaires? Perhaps writers block has set in. Is there an app for random topics to write about?

  • Dominican Detector! Are you Latino? Are you African American? Having a bad hair day sucks when you cannot find someone to do your hair or getting a tight hair cut? Is there an app that lets you pinpoint a Dominican that can do a fade, or a relaxer?

Well Apple boasts there is an app for just about anything….