Category: Afro Latino

Afro Latino, divorce, fate, my life, reflections, running

Year One


“I’ve been travelin’ on this road too long, Just trying to find my way back home. The old me is dead and gone dead and gone” Dead & Gone – T.I. Featuring Justin Timberlake

As I sit here in NYC again, I almost find it hard to believe that it has been exactly one year since I started this blog. Last year at this time, I knew that my life was about to under go a drastic change. The writing on the wall was pretty clear in terms of my marriage and I just needed an outlet. I needed something to get my mind off of all the things that were around me. So I started to write.

I wrote every day for 101 days. I spoke about anything that came to mind as if I never had a chance to have my voice be heard before. My original plan was to give a voice to Afro Latinos. I wanted to write a blog from that point of view. Perhaps give people what they have been missing.

As I spat out blog post after blog post, it became harder and harder to find a topic. Once that started happening, writing became less fun for me. I felt almost superficial in what I was saying. I looked at my blog and felt like a hypocrite. “Inside My Head” sort of became a joke to me because I wasn’t really writing about what I was feeling. I contemplated just quitting the blog all together.

Once May rolled around, I decided to just let it all out. I wanted to really face everything head on and take my readers with me on this journey. I was a little fearful that people may not read as much because I was getting personal and I was writing less. However, I noticed that my writing was getting better and in the same regard I was actually feeling a release of energy with every blog entry.

The blog began to really help me mentally. But those changes were really not going to be complete if I really did not start running. I can say that I must have thought of a great deal of blogs when I was on the treadmill. It is rare that someone has a change to change mentally and physically at the same time…and I seem to still be losing weight.

There were times in which I really felt that I was arguing with myself. Several blogs about fate and destiny have lead me to a different conclusion about my life than when I first started. The rest…well it just seemed to be about love or a variation of it. I wanted have this blog to pave the way for me to gain self redemption. I have made many mistakes in my life that I have paid dearly for and at times continue to pay for. My journey, through this blog, has and continues to help me look in the mirror.

Which bring me to what seems to be my new passion on the blog, my poetry. Please do not ask me where this came from because I do not even know. There are times when I have an idea and I need to write it down. Most times it comes out as a finished poem that I simply retype on to the blog. In the late summer, I felt a real need to find a different and more creative way to let what I was feeling out…without just saying it. The poem about Rocky was supposed to be poem that I just wrote and nothing more. But, as time passed, I just felt the need to just write more. When you are an emotional writer like I am, it is almost like a drug to get write every raw emotion down.

I have scanned my poetry. Someone indeed gave me a journal for Christmas and I am using that journal for strictly poems. I know that I have written most my poems out of stress and sadness. However, I do have some love poetry that I am not entirely sure I want to post. I will have to think about that.

So, for your viewing pleasure (and mine too), I am listing what I believe to be my top 10 blog of this past year. Maybe you will get a chance to read some if you have not done so already:

I am looking forward to Year 2 of this blog. I still think I have plenty to say and I just hope that you will all continue to walk along side me in my journey.

“I turn my head to the east, I dont see nobody by my side, I turn my head to the west still nobody in sight. So I turn my head to the north, swallow that pill that they call pride. The old me is dead and gone,the new me will be alright”

Afro Latino, history, Latinos, Roberto Clemente

Know Your History/ Conocer Su Historia


If you know you me well enough then you will know that when I first entered Syracuse University as a freshmen, my major was History. It was one of the few things that I was really good at in high school. I loved it and understood it. History was not just about dates but more about the events and how things occurred in the past that might effect our present day.

So when I really started getting into history when I was in college, I was shocked by a very disturbing fact, I was learning about His Story. History is always written by the winner in most cases. What bothered me the most was what I did not learn in high school. The thing that comes to mind the most was the Transatlantic Slave Trade. While, I knew about it in high school, it was never presented in the same way as it was in college. That always stuck with me, so I decided to talk courses in African American history.

Once I got a different perspective on history, I dropped the major and switched to English. However, I still wanted to know more about my history. At that time, there wasn’t a Latin American Studies program but you could navigate certain classes to learn about the Caribbean and South America and I made sure that I did that.

I bring this up for 2 reasons. The first being that I was speaking to one of my students, who is Latina, about know her history. I have no problem explaining how the slave trade impacted the Caribbean. I have no problem explaining how Europeans killed most of the indigenous population, raped the survivors, and then replaced the workforce with African slaves. Most of this information cannot be found in history books at the high school level. What I do have an issue with is people not knowing icons. The second reason is really simple. February is coming soon and that means Black History Month will be upon us. As usual, most Latinos think they they have no contributions to this month and that is the farthest from the truth.

I have a Wheaties Box in office. Yes it is there, unopened. The person on that box is Roberto Clemente. Maybe it is just me, but I feel that all Puerto Ricans should know who he is. What bothers me is the ignorance. I have been asked, “why haven’t you eaten the cereal?” I like how certain people scoff as if it is disgusting to have an old box of cereal. I always have this puzzled look as I think to myself that all they see is a box of cereal and not the person who is on the box. Why is that? Because they do not know their history.

Conservatives in Texas do not care if you never know your history. Clearly they believe that they can remove people like Cesar Chavez from the history books because he lacks “lacks the stature…and contributions.” Which basically tells me that they are just looking at the Wheaties box and not understanding that history cannot just be rewritten by the “winner”. It very much like how the MTA in New York City wants to remove free transportation for students. The less people who know their history, the more control the powers that be have. Make no mistake that racism is still alive.

So, my question to you. Do you know your history? Or are you faking the funk? The way to understand everything that is going on in this world, from Islamic Extremists to Gay Marriages, is to know the history behind them. Perhaps more perspective will be gained by everyone.

Afro Latino, Latinos, Major League Baseball, Sammy Sosa

Say it aint so Sammy!

Many people think I am crazy when I bring up the issue of color within the Latino Community. They tilt their head to the side with a crazy look and say “Really?” I have mentioned several times that most Latinos are color struck and feel that marrying a lighter skin man or woman is a way of raising up our people. But, Sammy Sosa took it to a whole new level.

Sammy Sosa was an icon in the 1990’s with his battle to be the home run king against Mark McGuire in Major League Baseball. Those two men brought back baseball from the dark ages that was caused by the labor strike. It also brought the out the fact that Sammy was Dominican; a very dark skinned Latino.

He has a very good public persona. Despite his issues at the congressional hearing on steroids where he, all of a sudden doesn’t know English, he has always been the type of person to attract attention. I regarded his skin color to very much be apart of who he is, it was apart of his swag as a baseball player and a Latino. Sammy represents Afro-Latinos just as much as Roberto Clemente during his career.

So the question is, how insecure does one have to feel in order to be able make your skin lighter? Was he feeling left out? He shows up to the Latin Grammy’s looking like Mc Lyte. Really Sammy? When I looked up the reason why he went through this transformation, I was shocked with what I found. He went through a skin rejuvenation process that temporarily lightens the skin color. Apparently women do this all the time according to his friends. They say he will be back to his negrito skin color soon.

Let’s break this down. So Sammy decides that he is going to rejuvenate his skin right before one of the biggest Latino events of the year. I would like to know what woman does this and gets the same results as Sosa did. Last time I checked, rejuvenating black skin did not need make it white. Think about all the white people who are desperate to get darker and go to tanning salons so they can be a shade closer to our beautiful black skin.

I am sorry, but I am not buying it. I think it is a piss poor excuse. I think Sammy succumbed to the pressures that of being Afro-Latino in Latin America. He has now become an affront to me and all Afro-Latinos who are proud of our heritage and proud of our appearance.

It is not a good look Sammy. Not at all.

Afro Latino, CNN, Latinos, Latinos in America

Latinostereotypes in America

Ok…I get it. I get why there is a need for Latino in America. I get that CNN wants to boost viewership while giving an unbiased look at Latinos in this country. I also get that Soledad O’Brien busted her ass on this show. What I do not get is the fact that despite all there was to work with that we are still made to look like all we do is multiply and struggle with English. Clearly that is not intent but it seemed to me that Latinos were shown in a light that made it seem that are constantly struggling.

The problem I have with this is that there are so many of us that are successful, including Soledad. If you saw Latino in America than you know that there were 2 stories in particular that had to with 2 young Latinas and their struggles through life. In the end, they both end up pregnant. Of course this is only defined by the fact that at the beginning of this show it is pointed out that Latinos are the fast growing minority. You think? From the way it is perpetuated, underage sex is the reason.

My question is, where are the stories that balance the negative? Where are the stories of the successful college Latina that to 2 majors, in a sorority, has a work-study job, and still manages to make the deans list? It cannot be that hard to find. I know that I can find several of them on campus right now. Maybe that doesn’t provide enough drama. Perhaps that is too real to see Latinos succeed.

I want to also add that I am not saying that just because anyone of us that may have children at an early age are failures. There are plenty examples that can made of quite the opposite. However, those are not document by this program. Both of those segments end with this feeling of…oh by the way, she had a kid.

What I also found interesting the 1-2 minute segment before each story. Those were more interesting than some of the featured stories. A good example is the 2 Mexican restaurant owners who boldly state that you will never see them serve tacos at their restaurant. Why? Because real Mexican do not just eat tacos! How amazing is that? But you not see that segment because that is way too positive.

Needless to say I am disappointed because not only do I feel a serious lack of positivity, but there wad no sense of hope. I feel like the average white person would see this and just say that the Spics and the wetbacks are taking over, as if we have nothing more to so than be illegal, fail in school, and make babies.

On a side note. I actually thought Latino in America was better than I thought it would be. So what does that say? I only say because I thought it could have been so much worse. They did show Afro Latinos which is a start, but I think they should have highlighted other people from South America. I know part 2 is tonight, so I can only hope things get better, but I know it wont…

So where do we go from here? Well for starters there are forums like this, which show examples of Latino success from their own words. We need to always remind people that we do indeed have success.

Afro Latino, culture, Latinos, my life

Afro is Latino


I can remember the first time I felt I was different. I was a small kid in catholic school and I questioned my appearance. I perceived myself to not be as cute as the other boys my age; the lighter skinned boys. Granted, I was a very skinny kid. Being called “flaco” was not something that was foreign to me. But, what really made me think that I was ugly had to do with how little girls responded to me versus some of the other boys I had seen.

I wont even go into the fact that some of my lighter skinned cousins thought it was quite amusing to call me “tar baby”. While that seemed funny at the time to them, I can remember asking God (in the numerous times I was at church because, again I went to catholic school)why was I born with bad hair? Why was I born not looking more like my dad since he can have flowing hair that women seem to be attracted to? I recall thinking why did I have to have darker skin?

I have the complexion of my mother. While I hung out with mostly African Americans, I was always told that I am not black. This lead to confusion because the mirror told me something different. So this made going to High School and College very difficult for me. It can be hard to try to fit in when you are not sure of your own place in world. Now that I think about it, this is probably the reason why I did not get along with many people in High School. I chose my friends sparingly and I think even to this day, I am not sure I can call many of them friends at all.

I always assumed that the college experience would be different for me and it certainly was. But the dynamic of not fitting in with African American or Latinos was unsettling. The funny thing is not many people really believe there is a difference in the social order, as if it were my paranoia. However, when you are a dark Latino you know that it is far more that just paranoia. I learned very quickly that people can be very color struck when it come to the appearance of others.

Just to break it down. White people have always thought I was African American. Which is why that I feel the need to represent my culture while I am in Syracuse. I use my Afro-Latino persona as a way to teach people that we all do not look the same. I bring this up because my parents cannot believe I am like this “Super Latino” when I am at work, but you know what? Someone has got to wear the cape. Most African Americans just think I am black as well, but they are not too surprised about my origin. Latinos…well they just know.

The funny (well maybe not so funny) thing is that during my college years it was just so very apparent to me that I essentially did not fit in any group for long periods of time. Of course, when I look back at it most of my good friends are black. I had always got the feeling that I was just not Latino enough for my Latino classmates (not all felt that way, but most). Was it perhaps that I did not speak Spanish as everyone thinks I should have? I am not sure, but there was definitely something because I do know that I was one of very few Afro-Latinos on campus at the time (believe it or not there were not the many Dominicans as there are now at SU…lol).

Why do I bring this up? Why am I all of a sudden writing about this? Yes, I know that this blog has been mostly about my road to redemption, but I want people to realize that no matter what I go through, this identity that I have will always be apart of me. I want people to understand that I am very proud to say that I am Afro-Latino. I understand why my skin is dark. I understand the African roots of my culture that includes the music, culture and religion. I also understand why people do not understand where people like me are coming from.

One of the questions I do get is why did I pick the name “latinegro”. Well besides the obvious connotation there is another reason. Two years ago, I did a research paper on Afro Latinos and I ended up coming away with so much knowledge that I used this name that I found which was coined by another person. Her name is Marta Cruz-Jazen and she wrote “¿Y Tu Abuela A’onde Está?”, which a very interesting article and she calls people like myself, latinegros. Clearly I loved it and had to use it.

So let me define what latinegros are in my own words that I am taking straight from the research paper that I wrote: Latino Negros can be identified as dark skinned Latinos. Often times they will be referred to as Afro Latinos or Black Latinos. In the various Latino cultures throughout the Caribbean and Latin America, they represent the bottom of the social ladder. They are normally the poor and uneducated. The term Latino Negro is a not a term that is recognized nor used, but it is something I feel best represents what I am in relation to other Latinos.

This is who I am. This is what I identify as. I may not have an Afro but the Afro has me…

Afro Latino, Latino Heritage Month, Latinos, Syracuse, Syracuse University

Latino Heritage Month

First let me say that my weeks seem to get busier by the day and coming up with blogs have proven to be difficult. I know that I have been basing many topics on love and life because of the many issues that I am facing. However, I do have another passion and that is mi cultura. I started writing this blog because I felt that Afro Latinos are just not represented enough and I wanted to carve my niche. I wont say I haven’t, but I know I do not write much about being Latino.

I remember a few month back, I would talk to people about my blog and I said to one woman that I do not talk much about Latino issues as I should. Her response was classic. She told me that the subject does no matter, since I am Latino…then the blog is about Latino issues. I am always amazed about how people view the world. So, I never gave my subject matter a second thought.

For those who do not know, Latino Heritage Month is really called “Hispanic Heritage Month”. Hispanic Awareness began in 1968 under the Lydon Johnson administration. It was once called Hispanic Heritage Week. Years later, under President Regan, it was expanded to a Month between September 15th and October 15th. The reason for the oddity of the dates is because of the numerous amount of independence days that Latin American countries celebrate within that 30 day time period. It was voted into law in 1988.

I was never crazy about the idea of having an “awareness” month actually being in between 2 months, but I do understand the reasoning. It made me think that how funny it is that Black History Month is during the shortest month of the year and that includes leap year. Now Latinos cant even have a real month we just have to bits of 2 months and call it our own. Sounds like good old fashioned colonialism to me, but I digress..

Speaking of that…I prefer saying Latino Heritage Month because I feel that is what is should be called. I have explained before how Hispanic is not a term I consider myself. Do I look Hispanic? No… I look black. Probably because I am a direct reflection of people who were indigenous to the Latin American Diaspora which does include the Caribbean. While I do get that this is a national month of recognition that that was created by the U.S. Government to celebrate diversity within our country, we have the ability to change the name. It was not so long ago that the term Latino was not even on the Census chart.

There are several blogs & social networks that I have listed on the side that more or less talk about the Latino experience. Depending on where you live or where you go there are tons of things to see and do during this month. The big thing that everyone on twitter is talking about is the LATISM (LATinos in Social Media) Conference. Although I cannot make it, I would really like to wish them the best when it comes to their events.

Syracuse University is doing some good things for this month as well. Here are some events that I know I will be attending or managing here on campus:

9/25 – 8pm Schine 304ABC – Poetry Nught Featuring Willie Perdomo
9/26 – 7pm Goldstein Aud – Fiesta Latina (Food & Dance, with live music)
10/8 – 6:30pm Goldstein Aud – Cafe con Leche with Rosie Perez & Mike Robles
10/10 – 7pm – Goldstein Aud – Phi Iota Alpha 15th Anniversary Baquet

There are just highlights in a great month that we plan on having. I know the city of Syracuse has some event going on as well. The one thing I will highlight is the Third Annual Latino Upstate Summit, which is on 10/23. I plan on being there.

I hope you all get a chance to enjoy a little bit of dance, a little bit of food, and a whole lot of culture.
Afro Latino, Blogging, my life

No Ideas What to Write…So I Ramble…

I have been thinking all day about what it is that I want to write about. I haven’t really been able to identify one particular subject that I have wanted to spend time to think and write about. Most of the posts on this blog have been so much about emotion and what burning issue is in my head. I will say after that poem I wrote 2 days ago, I have had writers block.

So, in what I consider to be in true fashion of a writer, I am going to write anyway. I think part of the block that I have has to do with the better mood I have been feeling over the last week or so. I have always prided myself in really being able to put my thoughts on “paper” when my emotions are either high or low. The problem is that the poem that wrote actually hurt me to write. I have never been hurt by something I wrote. It tookme a few hours to really put myself back together after that. I consider that to be good writing.

It also does not help when I get interrupted when I am writing. I am all about flow. I can flow pretty well when I start writing. However, if I get interrupted (like I did when writing this) then I lose my place. It also does not help that I am watching the George Lopez on Nick at Night. So I am laughing in between sentences.

One thing that I have realized is that everyone seems to be going through something personal. I feel that while I am going through my personal issues that it is very easy to forget that someone just may have it worse than me. I can that people front as if they are happy when they really aren’t.

So at this point, I am taking things day by day. I am looking forward to the students coming back. Work is pretty dead in the summer without them. Once I was done with my trip to Florida, I was ready for the school year.

I am really starting to like the some of the Twitter feeds and topics I am starting to see also. There are some real positive Latinos that I am following. I am constantly being reminded of why I started this blog in the first place. When I started this in January, I want to talk about the lack of Afro-Latinos in media and while I have done that, my personal like has gotten in the way.

Not to fear however, as we get closer to Latino Heritage Month, I am going to make sure I get back on track, so you may all be seeing my emotional side mixed in with my passion to educate my people about the invisible Latinos among us: Afro Latinos.

I will continue to update the links to show more me. I wont add photos because that is what Facebook is for. I want to mainly concentrate what I can pull from my head when it come to this blog. Below are sites you can find me at:

Afro Latino, Blogging, Latinos in America, love

Tid Bit Tuesday (Late Edition)

Thank You

I wanted to say thank you to everyone who has supported this blog by reading and commenting, weather on this site or to me personally. Thank you for voting for this blog when you had the chance. I feel that I really have something here. My voice is being heard and my audience continues to rise. I am really enjoying writing as much as I do.

I wanted to point out the Blog Roll on your right. Every time I see an interesting blog I will add it there. I have quite a few and encourage all of you to read some of these blogs. There are truly amazing writers out there. I am also looking for guest bloggers…

Love Again???

It seems that I am always writing about this subject. I think that I have been able to show the many sides of love. I will continue to do so. Yesterday’s post was powerful, but what really made it interesting is that the friend I dedicated that blog to replied today. I am sure she will be ok. More importantly, I seem to run into people that have told me that my writing has helped them in some way. I really do hope so.

I am actually in the process of coming up with a list of movies that have no love in it! This should help some of my friends who are also getting a divorce. Hey we need entertainment too!

Latinos in America

CNN is going to air this documentary in October about my people. While I am excited that this will show Latinos for more than what the stereotypes make us seem to be, I am willing to bet a small fortune that there will be no Afro-Latinos anywhere in that documentary. It has been awhile since I have talked about this subject but I already know how this story goes.

Afro Latinos are very underrepresented in all forms of media across the world, with the exception of athletes. I am so hoping that CNN will do something to represent them. However, I know better. As a matter of fact, many of us no better. When I talk to Latinos about this special they tell me that Afro-Latinos will probably be in Latinos in America 2. How funny is that?
Afro Latino, Blogging, Latinos, racism, Twitter

Allow Me To Re-Introduce Myself…

I feel that I need a reintroduction into what it is I am trying to accomplish here. My is Anthony. I am grew up in the Bronx. I live in Syracuse. I am Latino. I am Black. That does not mean I am am African American and Hispanic. That means I am a Latino Negro or Afro Latino. When I get counted during the Census, my race will be black and my ethnicity will be Hispanic.

Yes Hispanic or I should say His Panic? You see I am an educated person of color. I am an educated Latino male that speaks his mind and points out the injustices in the world. I know the power of the pen. I know the power of a subtle smile to those who hate me. I know to tolerate those who wish to see me back on the other side of the boarder.

I write every day for me. I write everyday because before this year, I was used to being silent. I was used to not speaking when it mattered most. I am willing to call out racism with America and Latin America.

I want to reintroduce myself to those who may read this blog for the first time. Those who may have clicked on this site based on Twitter comments. So please, welcome! Sit back relax read some posts and buckle in. It will be a bumpy ride…
Afro Latino, beauty, Latina Magazine, Sessilee Lopez

Negritas!

I am dedicating this blog to the beautiful black Latinas that most of us never see. Clearly what I am saying is all relative because yes we can see them everyday but do we “see” them in dominate positions of beauty? Probably not. I know plenty of dark skinned Latinas that are gorgeous. Their skin darker than mine and their beauty reminiscent of the great queens of Egypt; and when I say queens of Egypt I am not talking about Elizabeth Taylor’s “Cleopatra”. I am talking about Nubian Queens from la Caribe.

I had to make a short trip to the store tonight to pick up a few things when I saw the current cover of Latina Magazine. This cover made me stop in my tracks. I know that Latina Magazine has had dark Latinas on their cover before (although not as many as blanquitas), but for some reason this just stood out to me. This started making me think about what we as Americans consider images of beauty to be. So in seeing this cover I was shocked and quite happy!

Her name is Sessilee Lopez. She is Dominican and Portuguese and is a rising star in the modeling world. She has a blog too! Now, this post is not about about her, but in January I talked about naming famous Afro Latinos that were not David Ortiz or Rosario Dawson. So I am adding her to this list.

However, as much as I want to commend Latina Magazine for this wonderful cover, I am by no means saying that they are politically correct. We all know Latinas are not shaped like your average American girl. But, you would never know that from looking at the pages of this illustrious magazine. My wife has written letters to the editor about what Latina Magazine should represent. While they have never gotten back to her, they did respond to many other letters that that were similar, which pretty much stated that Latina Magazine does not represent real Latina women.

Afro Latinas, Latinegras, Dark Latinas, Morenas, or Negritas are several different ways to call these women. I have several in my family. My cousins (who I miss very much), my mother, my aunts, my wife, and 2 sister in laws. I have grown up knowing what true beauty is.
P.S. I love all Latinas of all colors… 🙂