Blogging – Page 3 – Anthony Otero

Blogging, my life, New Year, reflections, social networking

Reflections of 200 blogs…

I have to give myself some credit here. I am not the type to toot my own horn, but as I look at the numbers, this is my 200th blog entry of the year. I cannot even count anything I have done 200 times in my life, much less what I may have done in one year. Being the type of person I am, I usually get bored with things that happen in repetition, so the ability to keep writing about something new impresses me.

I do continue to reflect on the past year as much as anyone else does and I have taken some time and effort to look back at some of my past blog entries. I have edited them for spelling mistakes and grammar. I would like to take this time to apologize for all of those mistakes because I do try my best to make my blog legible. Some people have told me I need an editor, but since I do not get paid to do this neither would the editor.

My thanks goes out to all those people who have supported me in my efforts. Those people who have been there during my darkest days and have heard my darkest thoughts. I feel that I have bared parts of my soul on here which has allowed most you to really see what is going on inside my head. While I have not written about every last detail of my life, I think I have shown enough for people to get an idea of where my life is headed. If my poetry is any indication of what is going on with me, then you will know that 2010 will indeed be another bumpy year. Of course I am not saying that is a bad thing.

I am really not sure that I will make 200 posts next year. I attribute all this writing to the beginning of the year when I was writing about superficial things. Now that I have found my niche, I will try to focus on the changes that I need to make for myself. There is no secret that I write better when I am emotional or even when I am in pain. In my opinion, that is when I really begin to throw some words together to match the thoughts I have running around.

I also know that I will be more aggressive with my life. I will get back to the running that I so fell in love with over the summer. I need to find that job so I can move out of Syracuse. My upcoming trip to the Dominican Republic is going to be something that will effect me. I know that there will a reconnect with family that I am eagerly awaiting. I am anticipating a rough year and I am willing to roll with it.

I plan on being more private with my social networking. As of the new year, I will be make my twitter private. I am not sure how long that will be, but it will be for as long as it has to be. I have already set my Facebook privacy settings where I think they need to be. Myspace will be done and gone (who really uses it?). I am not sure about this blog in terms of privacy, but I think that I will figure something out. I do intend on keeping up with writing because…that is what I do.

Many people ask me about my love life. Well, I intend of keeping that as private as possible. Some people will make assumptions and some people will talk about whatever they need to. This is area in my life that I have made huge mistakes in. All I can say is that I intend on just being me. I will clean up what I need do and I will be as honest as I possibly can. I am done with much of drama that is my life and will attempt to remain as positive as possible. Everything happens for a reason.

The image above is snapshot of my year in statues on Facebook. It is an accurate depiction of some of the things I have been thinking. I want to thank all you for being there for me and for commenting. I do read all comments and I welcome any feedback. Cheers!

Blogging, dreams, social media

When it Rains…

I cannot believe it is December. The journey that I have started on this blog is almost a year old. I am quite impressed with myself that I have been able to keep this up for so long. The past 3 blogs I have had have all crashed and burned due to inactivity. I know I flirt with inactivity on this particular one, but sometimes I have nothing of value to say…or so I think.

I have made it to what seems to be the final lap of the year. Usually December represents a time for reflection of the past year and allows me to think about what I should be doing next year. While I while the process of reflection for me is yet to begin, I do know there are certain changes I need to make for myself in 2010. I do listen to what people tell me and with the desire to constantly improve myself I have come up with somethings that I think I will need to do next year.

The job search will intensify next month and since I have already been turned down twice, I think I need to makes some changes in the social media portion of my life. I am thinking of making all my interactions on Twitter private. I am thinking about making my Facebook profile private as well. While I will keep this blog open, I will make certain changes that will make it difficult to search my real name. All these changes are temporary but necessary. I do not need any potential employer to think I am emotionally unstable based on my writings and interactions. Personally, I do think I am, but perception is reality to many.

I have been mulling this over for the last week or so and I wasn’t really sure what I was going to do until I had a dream. While I do not remember the full details of this dream, I do remember that it was raining very hard. I was outside in the rain for whatever and clearly I got soaked. When I woke up, I remember think that this was the first time I have ever remembered being in rain. I thought I would take some time to see what rain in my dream could mean. Thanks the good people at Dream Moods, I was able to come up with this: To dream that you get wet from the rain, indicates cleansing from your troubles and problems. Rain also symbolizes fertility and renewal.

I have said before that I have had an awakening of sorts over the last few weeks. So the idea of being cleansed makes sense. My stresses are not what they once were and I feel that I ready to do big things with myself. I am indeed looking for a renewal and I am very confident that I will achieve that.

Blogging, family, fate, New York City

Monday Musing in NYC

5 days ago. That was the last time I have posted something on here. I have quietly promised myself that I would write an entry every day this week while I am in New York. Believe it or not I have a lot of time on my hands because it turns out that my aunt’s house is being renovated. The living room, in particular, is being turned redone so in basic terms: I have no TV. Which is ok, I can deal.

I brought down my notebook so that I can write any poems that seem to come to mind more often than ever these days. I normally write them down on paper before I type them on here. But, in either case, I have some reflections to do regardless. Unless, my emotions pull me in a certain direction, I think I will focus on family this week. I think this will be sorta like a “dry run” for Christmas and a precursor to my eventual move in 2010.

People have been asking me what am I doing for Thanksgiving and I would answer that with the usual, “I don’t know.” However, I think that deep inside me I already know that I am going to see my mother. At this point, it only makes sense. I just don’t know exactly what I am going to do yet, but I am sure I will figure it out.

As I write this, I already have another poem swirling in my head. I realize that I am becoming a person that I didn’t foresee myself being. I feel kinetic in a sense. I get emotions and feelings built up inside of me and I feel the need to pour it on paper. I wonder why I could not do this before, but it seems to happen quite often now. So I am very glad I brought down my book. I just feel that my poems are too short, but at the same time I am not trying to write the Iliad or the Odyssey.

The job search is proving to be tough. Most of the positions that I see I am over qualified for. I could be the boss. But, I am not discouraged. I know that something will come up. I feel that I have people looking out for me as well. I will also be real and say that I have only put my foot in the water. I have not dove all the way in yet. I wanted to test the waters and see what is out there. I do have a plan to be very aggressive starting January 1. I have applied to a few places and we will see what happens. Gotta let Fate take the wheel.

Blogging, Mike Robles, You Tube

A Letter to My Blog…

I know. I have been neglecting you. I just want to say that it is not you, it is me. I have been so busy with work. It is not like I have been visiting other blogs. Well, that is not entirely true..yeah I have. I am sorry I do try to write everyday! I have a notebook that I carry with me! Of course, I seem to be writing more poems then blogs…but I am writing! Ok…ok! You are still my number one. I will make a pact with you…

I have noticed that if I plan my days right I can make 200 blog entries for the year. That will require only 10 blog entries per month for the next 3 months. I fully plan on making this mark. Latino Heritage Month is coming to a close this week and I have one more big event weekend at the end of this month. This means that I will have more time. However, I have been job searching as well which take up much of my time as well.

The bad part of it all is that I have even stopped the frequency of my running! I still get to exercise, but being tired really plays tricks with you mind. I will say that my diet has not changed. I am still eating pretty well so I will still have the energy to run when I get back to it. Before, you think I have fallen off the wagon, I will be working on my arms today (finally). Not to mention that I have my daily Monday night basketball practice game. What I find funny is that I am the only one who has lost weight and has enough stamina to run back and forth from court to court.

I know what you are thinking. You have been my number one thing for such a long time and you think I am losing interest. That is just simply not the case! I think about you all the time. Sometimes I just don’t know what to say to you. When you are not looking I visit you but I don’t sign in. I don’t meant to be distant. My love for you is great. I even posted the video above to show you how busy I have been! I have even mentioned you!

I don’t want you to be jealous of Twitter. I mean, she is nice looking, but you and I have a bond! I came to you when I was a low point in my life. I have cried to you and I have told you all my thoughts. You have made me a better person. Because of you I am able to face all my fears and head them straight on. Because of you I have also met some truly amazing people.

So do not think that I no longer love you. That is simply not true. I think some times you need space from things so that you can truly appreciate them. I have grown to love you more and more everyday and I have some serious plans for us in the future. I wont tell you now because you will only get excited and bug me about when these changes will take place…but just know that 2010 is OUR year.

P.S. Mike Robles is pretty funny huh?

Blogging, my dad, my life

Overthinking Everything

I was talking to a good friend yesterday and he identified my number 1 problem. He told me that I over think everything. One thing about friends, the good ones who really know us , is that they can point out our faults without us getting hurt. I mean, this man is so on point. I do over think…everything! I am not even sure why I do this. (Disclaimer: I will probably over think this current subject, but this is my blog and I reserve the right)

Of course I overthink! That is why I have a blog so I can overthink any subject I please. I am not sure how I got through life without this blog. I find myself thinking so much about my issues as well as my job. The funny thing is, I don’t over think my job. Many times I just do. No matter the situation, I get into a groove and never over think a problem. The solution always seems to be in hand.

In my personal life, not so much. It can get to a point where some of things that I over think about can shut me down and stop me from doing work. While I know this is natural, I consider this to be big problem of productivity. However, I am not sure I know of any blogger that do not over think things. It is what we do. We analyze our topic and write about it.

I would like to think that I get this trait from my father. He over thinks a lot. He does not know this but, as a teenager when he was dealing with his divorce, I used to watch him sit at the table and watch him think. I could see the wheels turning! I would also watch the times when he was alone in the backyard, after he vacuumed the pool. My father would sit on the deck, put his feet in the water and crack open a beer. He would sit there for hours…just thinking.

Maybe I did get this sense to really think before I take an important action. It is not like I am not impulsive because I certainly can be. What I have come to find is that I do not like to make rash decisions. I have witnessed many people make rash decisions based on very little fact and that is something I do not want to do. I have been called indecisive and I think that is probably true, but I would rather make the best decision as possible. Let me point out that not making a decision counts as making one (am I making sense?).

Am I overthinking the subject on overthinking? Of course! This blog has been my forum that allows me to do this. While my friend wasn’t saying this to put me down, I wanted to remind him that the blog has been born from my ability to over think everything. It keeps me grounded, other wise I may just erupt with emotion without something to express myself.

Afro Latino, Blogging, my life

No Ideas What to Write…So I Ramble…

I have been thinking all day about what it is that I want to write about. I haven’t really been able to identify one particular subject that I have wanted to spend time to think and write about. Most of the posts on this blog have been so much about emotion and what burning issue is in my head. I will say after that poem I wrote 2 days ago, I have had writers block.

So, in what I consider to be in true fashion of a writer, I am going to write anyway. I think part of the block that I have has to do with the better mood I have been feeling over the last week or so. I have always prided myself in really being able to put my thoughts on “paper” when my emotions are either high or low. The problem is that the poem that wrote actually hurt me to write. I have never been hurt by something I wrote. It tookme a few hours to really put myself back together after that. I consider that to be good writing.

It also does not help when I get interrupted when I am writing. I am all about flow. I can flow pretty well when I start writing. However, if I get interrupted (like I did when writing this) then I lose my place. It also does not help that I am watching the George Lopez on Nick at Night. So I am laughing in between sentences.

One thing that I have realized is that everyone seems to be going through something personal. I feel that while I am going through my personal issues that it is very easy to forget that someone just may have it worse than me. I can that people front as if they are happy when they really aren’t.

So at this point, I am taking things day by day. I am looking forward to the students coming back. Work is pretty dead in the summer without them. Once I was done with my trip to Florida, I was ready for the school year.

I am really starting to like the some of the Twitter feeds and topics I am starting to see also. There are some real positive Latinos that I am following. I am constantly being reminded of why I started this blog in the first place. When I started this in January, I want to talk about the lack of Afro-Latinos in media and while I have done that, my personal like has gotten in the way.

Not to fear however, as we get closer to Latino Heritage Month, I am going to make sure I get back on track, so you may all be seeing my emotional side mixed in with my passion to educate my people about the invisible Latinos among us: Afro Latinos.

I will continue to update the links to show more me. I wont add photos because that is what Facebook is for. I want to mainly concentrate what I can pull from my head when it come to this blog. Below are sites you can find me at:

http://www.facebook.com/latinegro

http://twitter.com/Latinegro

Afro Latino, Blogging, Latinos in America, love

Tid Bit Tuesday (Late Edition)

Thank You

I wanted to say thank you to everyone who has supported this blog by reading and commenting, weather on this site or to me personally. Thank you for voting for this blog when you had the chance. I feel that I really have something here. My voice is being heard and my audience continues to rise. I am really enjoying writing as much as I do.

I wanted to point out the Blog Roll on your right. Every time I see an interesting blog I will add it there. I have quite a few and encourage all of you to read some of these blogs. There are truly amazing writers out there. I am also looking for guest bloggers…

Love Again???

It seems that I am always writing about this subject. I think that I have been able to show the many sides of love. I will continue to do so. Yesterday’s post was powerful, but what really made it interesting is that the friend I dedicated that blog to replied today. I am sure she will be ok. More importantly, I seem to run into people that have told me that my writing has helped them in some way. I really do hope so.

I am actually in the process of coming up with a list of movies that have no love in it! This should help some of my friends who are also getting a divorce. Hey we need entertainment too!

Latinos in America

CNN is going to air this documentary in October about my people. While I am excited that this will show Latinos for more than what the stereotypes make us seem to be, I am willing to bet a small fortune that there will be no Afro-Latinos anywhere in that documentary. It has been awhile since I have talked about this subject but I already know how this story goes.

Afro Latinos are very underrepresented in all forms of media across the world, with the exception of athletes. I am so hoping that CNN will do something to represent them. However, I know better. As a matter of fact, many of us no better. When I talk to Latinos about this special they tell me that Afro-Latinos will probably be in Latinos in America 2. How funny is that?

Blogging, Michael Jackson, music

My Soundtrack (Michael’s Edition)

I was going to write about how unmotivated I was, but then a Michael Jackson song came on and I had to groove to it. I began to think about how I skipped yesterday’s blog. I try not to skip days on this blog, but sometimes I have nothing to say. Don’t get me wrong, I can be busy too. I have written a poem that is not quite ready for this blog yet. I consider it to be too real. At the same time, I am contemplating the next blog for Monday. So I have a lot of things rolling around in this head of mine.

Anyway, with that being said, I wanted to build upon something I did last week: My soundtrack. It is so hard to pick a top 10 or a top 20 of anything these days. With Micheal Jackson, it that much harder. Most of his songs are just so damn good. They can make you groove, or make you think about the world, or just make you cry. I still maintain he has the best songs about love, which makes it so hard to list to at times.

So I decided that I will list the top 20 Micheal Jackson songs on my iTunes that I listen to the most. This will include all songs through out his career:

Blame it on the Boogie – The Jacksons
Off The Wall – Michael Jackson
P.Y.T (Pretty Young Thing) – Michael Jackson
Dancing Machine – Jackson 5
Walk Right Now – The Jacksons
Rock With You – Michael Jackson
Billy Jean – Michael Jackson
Don’t Stop ‘Til You Get Enough – Michael Jackson
Human Nature – Michael Jackson
Butterflies – Michael Jackson
Working Day & Night – Michael Jackson
Thriller – Michael Jackson
Can You Feel It? – The Jacksons
Remember The Time – Michael Jackson
Beat It – Michael Jackson
Man in the Mirror – Michael Jackson
Wanna Be Starting Something – Michael Jackson
Who’s Loving You – Jackson 5
Shake Your Body (Down To The Ground) – The Jacksons
Smooth Criminal – Michael Jackson

Ask me again next week and I will tell you that the order of these songs will change. Right Now, as I was compiling this list, I was listening to “Ben”. I do not have all his songs, but I am working on it.

Let me know what songs you feel should make this Top 20.

Black Weblog Awards, Blogging, laptop, Michael Jackson

Tid Bit Tuesday

Laptop Issues

My laptop is now giving me issues. Of course it will. This is a perfect way to end a horrible month. I thought I fixed this issue before when I was in New York City, but it seems that I will have to take other measures. I am not really too worried about it. I am just more annoyed than anything else.

When my laptop has issues I normally have to find other ways to entertain myself. I realize that I am a bit of a gadget junkie, but I tend to read a lot when I am online. Then there is this blog that I love to write. The most important thing to me, however, is my music. I am always playing music from my laptop. Yes, while I could play it through my iPhone, I have more variety on my computer.

I know I will end fixing it, but it does make me think about how life would be without one for a while. I think may need some time to “unplug”. I need to get back to reading. I have decided to dedicate at least one hour a day to reading. I will see how that goes. I have a lot of books that I can catch up on.

MJ on the Mind

As I had stated on Friday, I am still shocked and saddened by Michael Jackson’s death. I find myself listening to his music more now then ever. I used to listen to his music as it was, but now I have some songs stuck in my head. I have told myself that I will just play as much of his music as possible until I get tired of hearing the same rotation. Of course I am not even close.

I am also not interested in any of the drama that will come out about his estate and who is getting what money. It doesn’t matter anymore. I am more interested in why he hated his image so much. What makes a man who has everything change his appearance? Did he encounter such racism as a kid that he hated what he saw in the mirror? Maybe one day we will find out.

Blog Awards?

I am not the type of person to toot my own horn. I have stated numerous of times that I write for myself. However, I saw a fellow blogger had nominated himself for the Black Weblog Awards and I was just curious as to how one would go about doing this. So I did some research and in the end, I nominated this blog for some awards.

I will say that I have no expectations on winning. I am doing this because, as some people have put it: “if you don’t toot your own horn, no one will do it for you”. I think that ever so slowly I am getting a following and appreciate that and all the well wishes that I am getting. I think it would be cool just to say I was in the running. If you want vote for me you can click here. You can choose any of the 4 categories or all of them. Up to you. I will have the link on the right column until voting is over. Thanks again for all the support.

Blogging, health, Masters Degree, my life

Tid Bit Tuesday

Latino Community

I tweeted about this last week and I am not sure people took me seriously, but I was supposed to go to a meeting at the Spanish Action League to meet with a Representative from Governor Patterson’s office. We were supposed to talk about the lack of job development for the Latino Community. My point is there is no jobs on the West Side of Syracuse because no wants to move their business there.

Well I drive down to La Liga and I find out the meeting had been canceled because the director broke her arm! Of course, the office assistant had no idea who I was and what meeting her Boss was supposed to have. Gas ain’t cheap, so I really was not happy about the wasted trip. I get home and I find out they were calling Josie to whole time saying the meeting was canceled…well done. Great Job!

Doc Appoinment

My doctor is very happy with me! First off, I lost 10 pounds. This is very good to me with all the running and exercises I am doing. I haven’t been eating all the junk I used to eat. He seemed happy that my little issue was indeed the coffee. I can tell from his expression that he really did not want to check my prostate! Trust me I was just as happy as he was.

He tells me that I am good for another 5 years. I do not need to see him until I am 40. Whoa…how scary is that. I am going to 40 in 5 years. Thanks for the reminder doc. Not only am I letting go of all my issues but I have to reminded that I will be 40 soon. In either case, he tells me that he may not even be around by then, he will probably be retired. That is ok, I do not plan to be in Syracuse by then.

Grad School

Speaking of future plans, I finally got the 3 letters of recommendation I need for Grad School. All I need to do now is my personal statement. I guess it will similar to the Bio I wrote recently. Although, this will have to be more my goals toward education and what I plan to do with it. From there I will need to truly know how long this journey is going to take me.

I have taken classes already so I know what to expect in terms of class load. But, that is when I took 1 class per semester. This time I plan on taking 2 per. So, that will be challenging in itself.

Layout!

I wont lie. I love this new layout. I know it seems a little grayish, but I think it symbolizes where I am right now. A little gray, but when I am ready I will add color to my life. Right now the only color is from the words that I write. I am ok with that. I do not need anything flashy.