Leap Day Prose

I feel that I doing myself a disservice if I did not write on Leap Day. It just marks to me that the last time there was a leap year, I wasn’t writing at all. There is also a part of me that reflects on my life four years ago. While I will not get into that, I am just amazed how different my life has changed within the last four years.

Black History Month is just about over. The Latinegr@s Project has done a fabulous job in highlighting Afro Latinos. There seems to be an issue with Latina Magazine again in their definition of Afro Latinos. One person in particular has taken an issues with them and my team will be coming up with a statement about all this shortly. I am not getting into this now, but I am just relay that this is on my mind.

Women’s History Month starts tomorrow and I have not done anything for that in the past, however, that will change this year. I have many things on my mind when it comes to misogyny that I need to just get off my chest. I have been saying a few things on Twitter about domestic violence and the use of the word rape. There comes a point in time in which men need to stand up for things wether it be racism, sexism, or homophobia. I plan to have my say in March.

Then there was my debut in The Huffington Post this week. I am overwhelmed by the show of love from my peers and I will strive to make them proud. It took me a weekend to write and then another day to get it edited by my lovely girlfriend. I think she did a great job as a copy editor and pushing me to get to my point. Quite frankly, I wasn’t sure what my point was going to be when I started writing it. My plan is to blog once a week.

What I did learn from all of this is that I need to continue to elevate my game to higher levels. I need to push the envelope on conventional thought. My blog for the Huff is meant for me to talk about issues involving my time at Syracuse University. I want to treat that as my professional blog and I intend to do so by highlighting things around me.

Finally, I think a lot has to be said for karma. My last post a few days ago talked about how things happen for a reason. Well, up to this point, I had not expanded on any of the risks I am taking but I found it to be very interesting that one of my roommates is moving out. He got a job in Detroit and is leaving by the end of March. I am happy for him, but why is this interesting? Simply put, I a securing a deal to sell this house and I was going to tell my roommates about it in a few day so they can prepare to move. Amazing how life works huh?

What is your Karma?

“You see, there is only one constant, one universal, it is the only real truth: causality. Action. Reaction. Cause and effect.” – The Merovingian (The Matrix Reloaded)

I have written about karma before and I really do not want to keep repeating the same things. The problem is that I have been thinking about karma lately but only in a third person point of view. Clearly this is something that I believe in and stand by. I think that karma is a force within the universe that just happens. There are both good and bad karma. Most people focus on the bad. “What comes around goes around” is something that my dad used to say all the time when I was kid. Of course when he said he didn’t mean it in a good way either.

What I find interesting is how people determine what their karma is. As if karma will effect anyone of us in the exact same way as the deed we did. The best way to describe this is if person A were to screw person B over a promotion and person B will think that person A will just get screwed over by someone else in the long run over another promotion. Perhaps that is the case and perhaps not. Some times a person’s karma could be worse than imagined. I am not one to believe that karma will effect us in the same way that we effected others. However, there are unique cases in which it does. We all get what is coming to us.

This is also the same thing when it comes to good karma. I know that I am not the best person in the world, but I do care about people in general. I have been told I care a little too much thus, my flaw is that I have too much faith in people. Perhaps that is true. I have been raised to believe that everyone deserves the benefit of the doubt. However, people make mistakes and they screw other people over. It happens. The question because can the person handle the karmic recourse?

There is the issue of cause and effect. Everything we do will cause something to happen to someone else. It does not matter if that effect is big or small. It is almost a ripple effect of sorts. We can talk all day about how we need to be good people in order to get in heaven or at least a version of it. In some belief systems, karma is said to dictate how you evolve in the social order in the next life. So, if you are a total asshole in this life, in the next you could be reborn as a slug. Harsh sentiment, but some in beliefs, that is how it works. It makes me think about how some people of a certain faith believe that they can act in anyway they like as long as they go to church on Sunday, they will be absolved of all sin. Maybe that is the case, but karma is a bitch.

Better yet, we would have to beleive that the choices that we make in our lives will effect us throught the course of it. One would have to be willing to make mistakes in order to learn from them. It is said that people cannot change. I do not believe that. I think they can. I have see it. I have done it. Most people are not willing to change due to pride or their own self worth. Usually, it is karma that really plays a role into everything. People will get what is coming to them which is why we have this notion that good things will come to those who wait.

So what is do you believe your karma is? Did you screw someone over and in the back of your mind you are patiently waiting for payback from someone else? Does this allow you to trust people less because somewhere in the recesses of your heart you believe you are not worth the time or the energy? This is where I was last year. After everything is said and done, my karma proved to be a bitter pill to swallow. The worse part is that I know that I am good person. But, good people also make mistakes that they continually pay for. As time has gone on, I have learned to deal with my own shit and have grown in confidence ever since.

Karma is not just something that comes around. It is a learning mechanism that the universe gives to us. It is how we learn from our mistakes and not a matter of cosmic revenge. It is why we do not stick are hands in the fire because we know that we will get burned, but that does not mean we don’t use fire to warm us. Same thing goes with love and life. I cannot be afraid of getting hurt because I hurt people. At the same time, if I am going to get burned for being too nice, then so be it. Karma will come for everyone.

If you havent notice my litte subtle hints…karma and fate are ultimately linked.

Choices…

Over the last few weeks I have been thinking about how small choices can effect life in a big way. As shown on my post on Monday about Soul Mates, I have been listening to a lot of Chris Rock lately and he is a very quotable person.

This all started on my drive back from New York City on Saturday. Normally, I drive to music. I have an iPod full of music to make those 4 hours seem like nothing. I was not feeling in the music mood, which is rare because I am always listening to music, as I am now (If I Was Your Woman by Alicia Keys is playing on my iTunes right now). I decided to do something different. I needed to laugh. I am fortunate to have XM radio and I turned it to the RawDog Comedy channel. It was exactly what I need. I was in tears most of the ride back.

It made me think of Chris Rock and how funny I find him. Mostly because I think that he speaks the truth on so many subjects. We laugh because the truth is so ridiculous. As I was searching for the perfect clip about soul mates, I came across one of his quotes. The problem is, I do not know what show this is from:

You know, some people say life is short and that you could get hit by a bus at any moment and that you have to live each day like it’s your last. Bullshit. Life is long. You’re probably not gonna get hit by a bus. And you’re gonna have to live with the choices you make for the next fifty years.

I have seen the show that he mentions this. In the context of what he is saying it is hysterical. It does make me think about how choices can change a life.

For a long time, I thought my dad was going to live a long life bitter life alone, but he was able to have someone be in his life. More often than not, the choices you make in life come back to you. In my case, I am dealing with that now and it has brought a whole new perspective on what I need to do in my life (of course it is a work in progress).

Lately, when I walk around campus I seem to see one or 2 older people who are either sitting on a bench or walking around aimlessly and I think about what choices did they make to land them where they are. I see some of the same faces everyday and they look bitter. It is my belief that if you are old and bitter then you have made a lot of bad decisions in life that has gotten you to this point. Which is why I cannot get mad at bitter old people. Who knows how many times they have tortured themselves over a painful choice they have made. While it is easy to say that we need to accept the things we cannot change, doing it is a whole other story.

I recently heard a story about a woman I used to know. We were colleagues and I considered her a friend at one point but she decided to (in my opinion) be selfish and leave me to do several projects with no guidance on what she had done previous. This became a pattern with other people she knew and even lost her job in the process. When it came time for her to marry and have a child, she sent invites to all those she once wronged, including me. Turns out I was not the only one who did not attend her festivities. She recently spoke to a friend of mine and comment how no one was there for her, but my question is where was she?

Choices, good or bad, will come back to everyone of us. That is something I really did not have a concept of when I was younger and is now something I deal with. My father always told me what comes around, goes around. I have to admit once again he is right.