My Soundtrack (Michael’s Edition)

I was going to write about how unmotivated I was, but then a Michael Jackson song came on and I had to groove to it. I began to think about how I skipped yesterday’s blog. I try not to skip days on this blog, but sometimes I have nothing to say. Don’t get me wrong, I can be busy too. I have written a poem that is not quite ready for this blog yet. I consider it to be too real. At the same time, I am contemplating the next blog for Monday. So I have a lot of things rolling around in this head of mine.

Anyway, with that being said, I wanted to build upon something I did last week: My soundtrack. It is so hard to pick a top 10 or a top 20 of anything these days. With Micheal Jackson, it that much harder. Most of his songs are just so damn good. They can make you groove, or make you think about the world, or just make you cry. I still maintain he has the best songs about love, which makes it so hard to list to at times.

So I decided that I will list the top 20 Micheal Jackson songs on my iTunes that I listen to the most. This will include all songs through out his career:

  1. Blame it on the Boogie – The Jacksons
  2. Off The Wall – Michael Jackson
  3. P.Y.T (Pretty Young Thing) – Michael Jackson
  4. Dancing Machine – Jackson 5
  5. Walk Right Now – The Jacksons
  6. Rock With You – Michael Jackson
  7. Billy Jean – Michael Jackson
  8. Don’t Stop ‘Til You Get Enough – Michael Jackson
  9. Human Nature – Michael Jackson
  10. Butterflies – Michael Jackson
  11. Working Day & Night – Michael Jackson
  12. Thriller – Michael Jackson
  13. Can You Feel It? – The Jacksons
  14. Remember The Time – Michael Jackson
  15. Beat It – Michael Jackson
  16. Man in the Mirror – Michael Jackson
  17. Wanna Be Starting Something – Michael Jackson
  18. Who’s Loving You – Jackson 5
  19. Shake Your Body (Down To The Ground) – The Jacksons
  20. Smooth Criminal – Michael Jackson

Ask me again next week and I will tell you that the order of these songs will change. Right Now, as I was compiling this list, I was listening to “Ben”. I do not have all his songs, but I am working on it.

Let me know what songs you feel should make this Top 20.

Michael Jackson – In My Own Words

“Life aint so bad at all, If you live it off the wall” – Michael Jackson, Off The Wall

I am stunned. I am still in shock. I cannot believe this man is dead. My own reaction surprises me when it comes to the death of Michael Jackson. I guess I was one of the many people who took for granted that he would always be around to entertain us. Amazing how it is all about us. What about him?

I grew up in the 80’s and as I look back at that time, Hip Hop was just beginning and Disco was ending. Ronald Reagan was in office and the era of greed was being born. The Cold War was in effect and I remember having nightmares that we would have a Nuclear War with the Soviet Union. I was a skinny kid that felt he was ugly and struggled to find his place in a Catholic School he hated going to. There was one person that made that go away: Michael Jackson.

He was a larger than life icon that I identified with. He was cool and had such a swagger in his music videos. I wanted to be him, even if only for a few minutes. His music made everyone stop and dance. I remember my aunt having the Thriller Album. See with vinyl, the covers are huge! It was him laying down and when you folded out the cover would see him laying next to a Tiger! I was so amazed by that.

I connected with him because they would play the Jackson 5 cartoon in syndication. So, you could see adventures about them and listen to their old music. I was young enough to believe the music was all the same anyway. But, seeing him as a kid gave me a sense that I could be like him. I mean think about it…How many black cartoons were on TV besides Fat Albert?

Which beings me to my next point. He dominated POP music! He was a black man first and he dominated the industry. I remember staying up late to watch Friday Night Videos and New York Hot Tracks (I did not have cable at that time) to watch Beat it or Billy Jean. You have to imagine the impact of this black man on the black and latino youth. He was it. The problems in the Bronx would seem to fade when his music was on the radio.

I know…he had problems in the 90’s. I feel I need to say something about this. This man was the kindest man in the world in part because he never grew up. He never had a childhood and endured an abusive father. The pressure of being in the music industry is only enhanced because he lacked self esteem. He got lighter and lighter to gain acceptance that he felt he needed. He hated his nose because he felt he was ugly. We will never know what made him hate his image but I can say that he had a mind of a child and children is what he connected with the most.

Most people have passed judgement on a man we have no idea about. He was misunderstood. We do not know what happens behind closed doors. There was a trial and he was acquitted, but the court of public opinion will always rule. So, everyday he died a little inside. I am sure all he wanted was to have his childhood back. More people came forward with accusations and he paid them because he did not want deal with a trial. Why? Because trial or not. He was guilty in the eyes of the media.

I feel that he knew he was going to die soon. It just makes sense to me. He made music only for his children to hear (funny how no one mentions child molestation of his own kids right?) when he is dead. Who does that? He declined the Jackson’s Reunion Tour. Sure, he had a tour in the works, but I think he just knew…

It forces me to think about my own mortality. Yes, every death does. But this one hurt the most. Right now, it just makes me think about my entire life. When I hear his songs I tear up because some of it just hits home. Particularly his songs about love.

It is over now. He is dead…coincidentally, of a heart that could not take it anymore…a broken heart. He died a lonely man. That is punishment enough for anyone who thinks he committed a crime. It is over. Let the man rest in peace.

I will miss you Mike, your music will live in me forever.

My Soundtrack (For the Week)

The more I listen to music the more I realize that there are certain songs that I am drawn to. These songs seem to get a little more play than others on my normal play list. I make sure that I do not play the same thing over and over again from day to day. Which is why at work, I just have my iTunes on shuffle and let it play.

This week in particular, I have noticed that I have been rocking particular songs that have either meant something to me or are starting to mean something. There are times this week when maybe I payed a little more attention to the lyrics than I have before. Other songs are just a beat to bob my head to and makes me think of nothing.

In any case, music tends to soothe me. I have been trying to find a widget or a player to embed on this site that would show and play the songs that come to mind. When I find the right one, I will display it.

Below is my sound track of the week, which means that if someone made a movie of my life for just this week, these would be the featured tracks:
  1. Closer – Nine Inch Nails
  2. Karma – Alicia Keys
  3. Wake Up – Rage Against the Machine
  4. Let Me Be Myself – 3 Doors Down
  5. Remember Me – T.I. (featuring Mary J. Blidge)
  6. Keep it Movin’ – Leaders of the New School
  7. Love Lockdown – Kanye West
  8. Beggin’ – Madcon
  9. Goin’ Out West – Tom Waits
  10. Feeling Good – Muse
  11. Just Be – Tiesto

I have found these 11 songs have been on heavy rotation for this past week, for whatever reason. Sometimes, I find that I think too much as it is. I think I would rather have the music think for me.

Tidbit Tuesday

Santo Domingo!

It looks like I will be going to the Dominican Republic next year! My brother/cousin is getting married and they have decided to marry on the island of Quisqueya. I am very much looking forward to this on so many levels.
The fact that my new brother, Rick is getting married really makes me happy. I have seen him go through many trails when it comes to relationships and to see him getting to this stage is great. I felt weird telling him what is going on with me since he is now in planning mode, but it is all good.
Another reason why I looking forward to this is that I have never been to the Dominican Republic. This will be the first trip I will be on by myself (relationship wise) since I went to Cancun in 1997. So, I am looking forward to it.
Family Dynamics
Before I spread confusion to those who know me, I think I need to explain where “brother/cousin” came from. Rick is my cousin. We have been close for many years. His father is my mother’s brother. I have another cousin named David, who is older. Their mother is my new step mom.
How is this possible? Long after my parents split, my father start dating my step mother. She was already split with my uncle. They have been with each other since I was in High School! Which is why I have always thought that it was about time they tied the not. So when they got married, about a week ago, my cousins became my brothers by marriage.
I will not use the term “brother/cousin” again. They are simply my brothers now. So if any one asks, I know have 3 brothers.
Running
I ran my ass off last night! I almost did 4 miles. I am quite proud of myself. I program the treadmill to go for 45 minutes and I will run for as long as I can. I will start for less than a minute on speed 3 and then when I get my fast music ready, I bolt to 6. My goal here is to see how far I can go at that speed until I need to slow down. Last night I was able to do it for more than 15 minutes, which translates to 1.5 miles straight without slowing down

What I am amazed about, is that this all possible because I got new running shoes. My dad gave me an early birthday gift. I told him I needed running shoes badly and he came through. This is my first real pair and they make all the difference in the world.

I do have a goal. My goal is to be in peak shape my May of 2010. Just in time for my trip to Santo Domingo. I would like to look good and to feel good. I think will have to adjust my diet. That will be next on my list.

Movie Season

I have been really over the top with Movies this year. I saw 4 movies last week. I feel like every year the movie season is better than the last. Let me just list the movies that I have seen since May 1st. X-Men Origins: Wolverine (twice), Star Trek (3 times), Angels & Demons, Terminator: Salvation, and The Soloist. This is crazy to me. Not to mention that Transformers is coming out on June 24.

I will say this. The best movie out of all that I have seen was The Soloist. The other movies were pretty much entertainment and they were all very good. However, The Soloist is just on a different level. Jamie Fox and Robert Downy Jr do a fantastic job of telling a story about poverty and mental health issues in this country. It made me feel grateful for what I have.

The Soloist is near the end of its theatre run, so I would see it if you get a chance.

Music

One thing I liked about The Soloist, is the music. I am very much into classical music and the big band sound. There is something epic about this type of music. The bad part about this is that I have very limited knowledge when it comes to classical music. Sure there is Mozart, and some other names I cannot pronounce, much less spell. But, I appreciate the music.

Music in general is what keeps me going. While, I have been trying to avoid overly depressing music, I have been listening to a lot of Rock and Club music. Hip Hop is always in my heart, but there is so much wack music lately that I need substance. Nas will never talk about matter of the heart. Today’s R&B is not cutting it either and I hate that Birthday Sex song (quite possibly because I will not be having any sex on my birthday…lol

Maybe it is because I am older that I would rather listen to something that reflects me a little more. So listening to music about wack shit is just not going to do it for me. I need to listen to song that make sense, or have a good enough beat so I can run to it, or quite simply make me dance

One more thing, Salsa will never die with me! So I talk a lot of shit about any other genera but Spanish music is different level. I can listen to it at anytime.

Please Don’t Stop the Music…

First Fridays was good. I loved it. Getting together with other black folks was just what I need to start off my weekend. I was able to finally have fun. Other parties were good this year, but this time I didn’t have to worry about how I was getting home or worry about driving someone else home.

While it was not as packed as I would have liked it, there was enough black people to have fun. I am sure once First Fridays really picks up steam, then there will be plenty of people to hang out with. I will say that you will not see pictures of me on Facebook. I have banned them.

I love being able to go out and here music blaring, the one thing that I gets me, is that I wish I knew the names to all the songs I hear in the club. When I hear a song I really like, I will write it into my phone. Of course, I am not sure what the title of the song would be. I will guess the song based on the words I hear during the chorus. This does not always work.

Here is the thing. I collect music. If I hear it and like it then I need to have it. So last night I heard 3 songs that I needed to have. I was only able to “get” one. This does bother me. I love listening to music, no matter where I go. At this point I just have 2 songs in my head and is forced to browse music sites searching for these songs.

While that sounds pretty desperate…I always find new songs in this process. If anyone knows a better way, they need to let me know…

Latinos Are Black!

I have had something on my mind for the last few days and it feels like it falls in line with somethings that I have written about over the last several weeks. I know that I have talked about Black Latinos and how we fit into the world and one of the things that really bothers me is the ignorance of other Latinos to the fact that we are indeed Black. Not exactly of another way to put it. But it is true we are. Not just Afro-Latinos, all Latinos.

Where was this sparked off? Well, I was told by one of my students that in a meeting, of an Student Organization that I advise, one of our members made comment about why should we help an African American Organization since we are not Black. I wasn’t there. So I would only assume that she would not have made that comment if I had been there. But, then again, maybe she would have. This girl is a typical looking Latina. Long strait black hair and, is of course light skinned. I don’t consider that light, but she would fail the Brown Bag Test.

So here, again, is my issue…why the denial? The last time that I spoke about this issues, I used history as an example. This time I will use Musica Latina. Salsa & Merengue both heavily use drums to supplement any song. Some of the best song are have heavy drum beats. I would suggest that you listen to Hector Lavoe’s “Aguanile“. The introduction to this song alone is African based. The beat is very African and I could imagine any African Dance Troupe getting down to this song. I believe this song, as well as Hector Lavoe, was ahead of the times.

Again, as I mentioned before, my father has a substantial music collection when it comes to Salsa. Every time I go and visit him in Florida, I make sure that I swipe some music. On my last visit, I copied the CD collection that I am still rocking, Salsa: Fania All Stars. What impressed me the most about this album is the informative interludes which talk about the history of Salsa. On interlude entitled Slave Ship this is what the narrator says:

“The first roots of Salsa were African; across the ocean on slave ships filled with misery and human degradation, the hard driving tribal sound of African music had somehow survived. But shortly after it reached here, in the Caribbean, it started to evolve into something different. It was still African in flavor but the music had become unique.”

I was floored when I heard this. Not because I didn’t know, only because it was said on a this CD. Many old school Latinos don’t want to admit they have some African blood. I would assume they thought that they were either strictly indigenous or Spanish. However, the music is a dead giveaway.

Music is a link to our past, all you have to do is listen.

Blame It On The Boogie…

I struggled with a topic to discuss tonight. Depending on the day, it does take me a while to unwind from work. So, today being one of those days, I thought to myself maybe I should play some music to focus because I have come to the realization that this is what music does to me. I cannot explain it, but I can to school work or write a novel, all to music. Right now I am listening to some house music as I am writing this. Daft Punk to be specific.

Some of the students make fun of me because when they come into my office it is almost like a party. I normally have my itunes on shuffle so that I can listen to pretty much anything I have at any point during the day. I laugh because I had a meeting with a colleague today and we are having a serious conversation and in the background you can hear, “Brooklyn, We Go Hard”

It reminds of my days when I lived on South Campus when my roommate, Pop, would wake me up with music. That man would not let me sleep past 9am. So sometimes he would walk in to my room dancing to some new beats he got from one of his friends. I never considered myself much of a dancer. I mean I can do a mean chair dance. I have always been one of those people that would just bob my head to the music in a club. Unless, you put on some Salsa or Merengue, then it is on. Then I can cut it up!

Then there is the whole karaoke craze. I am not crazy about humiliating myself in public. However, I have been persuaded to sing a song or two. But, of course to me the Karaoke places that I have been to don’t really have the selection that I would like. Because I will admit, that if they have certain Michael Jackson songs…then may just have me jamming. I am talking about black Micheal. I am down to sing P.Y.T., or Off The Wall, or Billy Jean, I may even hit you up with Blame it on the Boogie or better yet, Dancing Machine! (I have a whole routine, I just need 4 brothers…)

I love music. If it has a good beat then I am all over it. So much so, that I have started a music collection that I am pretty sure that is so broad and I will never complete. I feel that my music collection is journey of my life. My parents would always playing music when cleaning, cooking, and driving. So, the music I heard as a kid is always something I have been interested in and will always look for. The tricky thing is that I am dealing with so many genres.

My father, to this day, is a gadget person, so back in the day, he had vinyl, 8 track, tapes, and even like old school reel to reel. I, of course, was not allowed to touch any of his things because I would destroy anything I touched. I do remember the number of records he had of Salsa. So many albums form Fania Recording Artists. So, he would make these tapes with El Gran Combo, Celia Cruz, Hector Lavoe, and I could go on. I am still looking for all those songs now!

My mother, while she was into Salsa. She loved Motown. So one minute I could be listening to Marvin Gaye and the next Diana Ross. I can never really prove this, but I think my parents went clubbing in the 70’s. Someone was playing Disco, because that is just another genre I cannot get enough of. Not to mention that I was an 80’s kid and was around to hear the birth of hip hop. My brother had a boom box! He loved him some Kurtis Blow, LL Cool J, and Run DMC.

He amazes me because he still follows hip-hop. I call him the oldest Jay-Z fan alive. His response? The Rock is in the building! (He was a Guy Fan too…so I sing “Groove Me” just to get under his skin)

Name a hot song and I might just have it. If I don’t have, I will get it…

It was all a dream…


I do not go to the movies as often as I would like to so when I went to see Notorious, I was hoping to be transported back to the early 90’s. I am always amazed when a movie passes my expectations and I was indeed transoported. Notorious not only made me relive my college years but also made me dust off all of The Notorious B.I.G.’s cds. For anyone that is a hip hop fan this is a must see. This is when hip hop felt real.

I will not divulge any details, however I will express a few things:

Lil’ Kim protested her role in the film because she not portrayed accurately. Being that the film is not about her to begin with, I think that her role in the film was really not bad. She came across as someone that loved Biggie Smalls, but could not escape the fact that he only saw her as his mistress. Regardless of all that, he respected her and her skills (on mic of course…yeah yeah and that too).

Jamal Woolard, who played Christopher Wallace aka Biggie Smalls, was fantastic. He had it all down, the flow, the heavy breathing, even the laugh. Kudos to him for a great job.

Finally, I am impressed that this wasn’t a Sean Combs show. This movie was meant to be about the greatest rapper of all time and it remained that way.

*****

Of course this movie got me to thinking, “How different would Hip Hop be today if Biggie was still alive?” While my opinions will be disputed, I am willing to defend them as well. I spent the better part of the night thinking about this and I came up with some these:

– Jay Z would not nearly be as big as he is right now. Neither would Beyonce for that matter…
Mase would still be in Hip Hop
– 50 Cent & Lil’ Kim would have better albums
– Junior Mafia would still be around (The Lox would still suck)
– This can go without being unsaid but, the state of Hip Hop would be better

Can you imagine a song with The Notorious B.I.G., T.I., Kanye West, Lil Wayne, and vocals by T-Pain? Damn, I do miss Biggie (and Big Pun).

Been Awhile…

{Originally Posted on Myspace}

Yeah so, it has been a while since I last wrote a blog. So here are some random thoughts:

I have been mad at my job. But I wont get into that. But, I will say that it has never been harder being Latino in a predominately white workplace. So, I will leave at that.

Things have been ok though. My trip to NYC was good. Went to a Met game which was great! David Wright is the man. I drank way too much! Then I got this fat hair cut (which is all gone now). That cut was so tight that I threw out my clippers when I got home. I can never duplicate that. So now I am on a mission to find a barber up here. I do have a few leads. I am going to go get a cut this weekend.

I went to a play called Beer for Breakfast (please check my top 16), starring the ever talented, Ricardo Maldonado (check my top 16). Please check it out, although, I dont know when the last date of the play is. Oh, if you are not in NYC, then you cant see the play and are officially, ass-out.

I saw the Al Gore movie, An Inconvenient Truth. Powerful shit! You need to see this movie. We are all gonna die soon! I wish I could laugh about it but it is true. All you people who dont think it is not a coincidence that we got all this rain and flooding is fooling themselves. Manhattan will sink before California breaks off…and Syracuse is on hill, so am I chillin…lol.

Can someone tell me exactly when old school music ends? I am thinking 1992. I say that because Low End Theory from A Tribe Called Quest should definitely be condsired old school. But Das Efx and Redman who came out that year shouldnt be. Plus, 1993 is when Wu Tang Clan came out and as much as I love me some WU Tang, no way are they old school.

Ok, who really cares about Tom Cruise and his fucking kid? I dont. Shit when Will and Jada were having kids we heard nothing about that. I guess the media dont want to focus on black children unless they are looting in New Orleans.

For those who have asked, my I-pod is fine. I do have to take it in to be looked at though (wtf) because when you plug it into a computer it is supposed to charge. Well needs less to say it does not. Can they make anything right? You know Microsoft is coming with something to compete with these FU-Pods? Well they need to hurry.

Last thought, who really has 230 friends on myspace? I mean, I am not hating even though I got like 67. I makes me laugh cause I did not think I KNEW 67 people.

Old School is the Only School

{Originally Posted on Myspace}

I have such a love for music. I realize that more and more everyday. There are several things that I love outside family and friends (and pets); Music, baseball (lets go Mets!), comic books, movies, and to a lesser degree video games. Yet, music bridges the gaps in my life. I hear a song and my mind will flood with memories of either good or bad times in my life. Certain songs will even make me think of a sunny day of when perhaps I first heard the song. I can say that Alicia Keyes first album Song in A Minor reminds me of brisk Syracuse mornings because I played her CD non stop each time I walked to work from Fellows Ave. So there is no wonder that, as I write this, I have 2138 (and growing everyday) on my I-pod.

The music I collect ranges from just about all genres, except country. But, I like to believe that I specialize in the old stuff or what I consider to be old. Sure, you will hear me jam to T.I. in my office but, I love music from the 70s and the 80s. I am talking about Old School Music. I mean I am really talking about when Disco was hot, when rap music was brand new, when R&B was really Rhythm and Blues, and when Michael Jackson was black. I am also talking about when Salsa music was classic!

I really believe I have the best music collection of anyone my age. I can make a play list for any occasion. You need background music? I got jazz for you. You need entrance music? I got music from soundtracks you wont believe. Lets not forget House music and all it forms. Lets not forget old school reggae either. I cant get enough of this stuff and just when I think that I cannot think of any more music to get, I see a commercial that has a song I dont have. Better yet, my father will have CDs of salsa classics I did not even think about before. The world of music, you gotta love it.

Funny story before I sign off. I was in the Bronx the other week (and happy to say that it is rockin) and when I visit my old hometown I make sure I bring new music back up with me because Syracuse isnt on top of all this shit. So I am on Castle Hill. Just got out of eating from a place called Sabrosura. I figured I would stop by a place called S.O.S, which is a DJ Specialty shop. I get all the music I need from this place. So we walk there and I see this small woman cop, who was built like a fucking rock, come out of the store. She doesnt have on a uniform, but you can tell she is a cop because of her gun and her handcuffs. I am thinking, ok she got some music and as I am about to walk in her partner was like, nah man, they are closed. So I am looking around like why the hell are they closed??? This guy, who is sitting on a mailbox next to two of his friends explains that they got shut down due to bootlegging and other illegal shit. Damn! I was so madbut I wont tell the cops how I bought a phat CD in a SHOE STORE near Pelham Parkway! As, I said…cant live without the music (and yes, it was and old school cd).