It may be early December, but I don’t think it is early enough to start talking about goals for 2012. I feel that I need to get a leg up on the next year. This year has been filled with many surprises and disappointments that I am just going to look at the next year to continue my on going journey back to New York City. I have come up with five goals I need to complete in addition to sub goals that should help me. Besides, do I really what to create a set of New Year’s resolutions? I think I would rather set goals. A resolution is an expression of an intent. A goal is an objective that you can plan for, which is why I want I think about this now as opposed to 3 weeks from now.
Getting a job in NYC is my first goal. This is not a new thing. I have been trying to do this for two years now. The interviews themselves are hard to come by when you compare it to the number of applications that I submit. It seems that looking for employment is almost a full time job. I have been at this for about two years and I have only gotten interviews from five institutions.
Which brings me to my sub goal, getting more interviews. The odds will work in my favor if I can increase the amount of opportunities that I get. I am still trying to figure out if being in Syracuse is a reason why I am getting overlooked in the first place, which is why I am going to get some additional help. Employment counseling is my primary focus for the moment. I need someone to evaluate me and my skills in a interview as well as looking at my resume to tell me where I may be going wrong.
When it comes down to it, I need to Publish this book. I have already named it, My Twisted Life Through Lines of Poetry. I have already written all the subsequent poems that will be in it, I just need to buy the ISBNs required to publish. $250 is a lot of money to me and I was about to pull the trigger about a week ago but, this is the holiday season and I know that I will be in NYC for at least two weeks and I am really not trying to come up short with any kind of money. I am looking to make this purchase at the end of the year to start the designing of this publication. I may have just found the cover photo too (see above).
Getting all this done will require me to do more Performances and Get More Speaking Gigs. Let’s be real here, I need to get off my ass and put in the work. However, I believe in my heart of hearts that I need to get the publication going off the ground before I go out there and tell people that I have a book coming out. It will sound superficial and ridiculous if I don’t. The only person who can market me at the moment is me. I am making the personal commitment that this is one thing that needs to be done.
I need to Take Care of Myself. Over the last year in a half I have fallen off this routine that I have had. I finally admitted to myself that I have let my own personal health go. I am not saying that I have been getting sick because that is not the case. I think I have been in good health, but I know where I was in 2009. I need to get back on the health kick. Sure, I stopped drinking soda and replaced it with water in my diet, but with lack of exercise is noticeable to me. I wont even get into the fact that I need to see the dentist more as well get a check up. One requires money I don’t currently have.
However, I think Running Again will put me back on track and make me feel great about life in general. I did buy a pair of running shoes to replace the old ones that I literally ran to the ground. I am not sure what it was about this year that made me fall off my running game, but I am not going to let that happen next year. After all the holiday mess at the end of this month, I am going to change my diet to something that is worthy of a runner. I will say this, I gave up Splenda last month and I think that is a fabulous start.
I have not spoken about this in a very long time but, I need to Get another Roommate. At the beginning of this year, I had 3 roommates and things were good. One decided to leave due to issues with the other two. It was a fluke to even have the the 3rd roommate anyway given the condition of that room. It needs some work done on it. I need to spackle and paint the walls and one window needs to be replaced.
Sure, the room is livable right now if someone really wanted it. It is not in terrible shape but, a fresh coat of paint and a new window will go a long way. What am I waiting for? Right now I do not have a window replacement budget. I can but the window from Lowes because I have already researched that, it is not too expensive but who is going to install it? Exactly….I need money for that.
Lastly, I think this may go without saying, but I think I need to Be a Better Man. I think in many ways I fail to live up to my own standards of what I think a man should be. A man should be able to deal with all the issues that I have listed above./ I have many of these issues due to self doubt or poor decision making in the past. So, I am looking at things now in order to just be a better person, but being a better man means being a role model and a leader amongst other men. I am not sure I do as well as I could with this.
I also want to Be a Better Boyfriend. This is not to say I am a bad boyfriend right now but, I feel that my past relationships have ended in part because I was not mature enough deal with what life was throwing at me. I think that I could have done things better and handled myself better. I want to be more than I was before because I am not longer afraid of holding back for whatever reason. I think that my relationship with my mother haa gotten better and the fact that I want to move back to NYC to be with family makes me more compassionate and understanding. In short, I want to experience a romance that I have denied myself for far too long.
I would encourage you all to think about goals rather than resolutions. I am tired of making resolutions I cannot meet because I didn’t have a plan. I would much rather plan out a goal so I can prove to myself that life gets better as I get older.