Poem #5 Fear Write

Fear in my heart
not sure where to start
or where to end
i cannot pretend
that life is also
puppies and rainbows
but I can hope for something better
I recognize my privilege
because my life is not that bad
although better than yours
at least I can look
in the mirror everyday
and know who I am
and know how I am dealing with
there is no sugar coating
the truth
that all people suck
some just better than others
and while I may have had
a few too many
I know that I am thinking
quite clearly
you just choose not to hear me
my emotions rule me
and make me a better man
because I am in touch
with all the things that
any man should
but rather hide
according to the guide
all men are assholes
and I am more of the
sum of the whole
or the hole of the some
I just rather just freeze
my veins
and become like the rest
go from hole to hole
like a game on the green
but i know myself
I am not that mean
so that just leaves me
back a square one
with thoughts that are clear
and a heart full of fear 

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